Count the Cost

Happy Thursday lovely ladies! If you've been keeping up with the blog (which I hope you have been!), you know Jenny posted a blog post last week that introduced this month's  theme: FREEDOM. I don't know about you, but to me, freedom is an intimidating word. All my life I have struggled with wrapping my mind around the concept of surrender. I'm the kind of person that wants to see the reward of my "good behavior", obedience and faithfulness to God immediately. If situations in my life are not going according to plan (which happens 24/7), I feel anything but free. I tend to feel trapped. Trapped in a version of life that wasn't what I envisioned, and for the longest time, the people in my life that I viewed as free were the most put-together, radical Christians on the outside. In my mind, perfect people, people God liked more than me were truly free.

I am aware this is a completely twisted and misconstrued definition of freedom to live by, but I want to be as open as I can possibly be on this website. To be honest, even right now as we speak, I feel anything but free. Jenny mentioned in her last blog post that the definition of freedom is the state of not being imprisoned or enslaved. The beauty of freedom is this- it's not a feeling, it's a choice. So today I can say I AM free, even though I don't feel free because of the personal decisions I've made in my own walk with God. Living a free life will require a few things.

  1. Good intentions.. followed by RIGHT DECISIONS.

Ever heard the quote "The road to hell is paved with good intentions"? Yeah, it is. No one ever lived the life they always dreamed of or reached their goals by chance or luck. Freedom from anything-drugs, porn/sexual addictions, alcoholism, cursing, cheating, lying, insecurity, doubt, even freedom from fear require Biblically-sound decision making. Good intentions are cute, but consistent right decisions separate the men from the boys. You can be the person you know deep down you were called to be if you CHOOSE to be. If that means rehab, go to rehab, if that means deleting apps on your phone to keep your mind and thoughts far from sexual sin and close to the heart of God (because women struggle with porn just like guys), if that means confessing a personal struggle to a pastor-DO THAT. Freedom will always cost you something! Count the cost, how long will you stay bound?

  1. Accountability

One of the not-so-fun parts of counting the cost is having good accountability in your life. Your accountability shouldn't be your best friend that struggles in the same areas or your significant other, it should be someone further along in their Christian-walk than you are. Someone who will challenge you, and not let you get away with it (whatever "it" is for you) a second time. The cost of freedom is telling that person when you mess up, even if it is shameful. In the end, it will all be worth it!

  1. Prayer

So many of the things I used to struggle with growing up (insecurity, body shame, fear of being great and so much more to come in a future blog post...), I've gotten freedom of through prayer. I have decided to make my prayer life with God open dialogue with God where I tell him exactly what I'm feeling. I constantly beg Him to help in the areas I fall short in, and to give me strength when I feel weak, and guess what-He does! Everytime without fail. It isn't always instant, but the peace I feel after just talking to God openly and honestly about the areas I need freedom in can't compare to anything in this world. Jesus is a listening ear to the broken, and a counselor to the hurting. He is our "ever present help in time of need" (Psalm 46:1), He is "a friend that sticks closer than a brother" (Proverbs 18:24).

Turn to Jesus today and look to Him as your source of freedom. This world has nothing to offer us-drugs, money, sex, and sin will only leave you feeling trapped, bound and locked up. A free life is accessible to you today. Wherever you are, why don't you whisper this prayer with me?

Jesus, I need you

I want to experience your freedom first hand, I know this world has nothing to offer me. I know I fail and I mess up constantly, but today I choose to follow you with my whole heart. Exchange the problems, addictions and issues that weigh heavy on my heart for peace, comfort, joy, and freedom. Make me more like you.

I love you.

In Jesus name, Amen.

Be blessed in all you do today! Now go out and enjoy this new-found freedom! Grab some Starbucks, text that person that you want as accountability and share your heart with them. Surrender your problems at the feet of Jesus, and watch Him completely change your life.

Never forget you're a daughter of day, a queen in every sense of the word!